"Expectations never seem to end." 📷
The reality of high-pressure environments
Read time: 5min
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“We can’t control the filters the others choose when they look at us." - Rachel Wolchin
Hi,
How was your last week?
“How do I stay motivated and emotionally grounded in high-pressure environments where expectations never seem to end?”
That’s how a reader started a private message to me. They continued:
“There are moments when you feel as though something is always missing, as if you’re constantly falling short, even when you’re doing your best.
It becomes difficult to recognize your own value 100% of the time and self-doubt can quietly undermine both confidence and productivity. It affects how I focus, how I prioritize, and how I set boundaries.”
If you’ve ever felt like this, now you know you’re not alone. And if someone else came to mind while reading this, forward it to them. They’ll feel seen and thank you.
Why share this with you?
Because most of your bad busy days are emotional challenges.
They’re about how you stay resilient, grounded, confident of your self-worth, and motivated in environments that weren’t designed to nurture those things - especially at senior levels, where expectations keep rising but recognition doesn’t always follow.
I can relate. Not only from my corporate days, but also today.
What makes this tricky is that it’s complicated. But not the way you think…
the why
Your perceived reality is never the reality. It’s reality filtered through how you’ve learned to see the world.
For example:
If like me, you grew up hearing “No, that’s bad / wrong / impossible”, you see first what’s broken, missing, or impossible everywhere.
If like a dear friend of mine, you were diagnosed with ADHD later in life, you might start filtering everything through “This is because of my ADHD.”
If like a leader I’m working with you moved countries and were told to work hard to proof yourself, you may still be working harder than necessary.
If you work for a difficult manager (like a number of my clients), your filter can become “My boss is the reason I can’t have work-life balance.”
If burnout stories surround you (or if it’s your story… sorry if that’s the case), it’s easy to internalize “This is inevitable.”
None of these filters make you weak, naive, or pessimistic. They make you human.
And here’s the empowering part: Once you notice your filters, you get to choose which ones you keep and which ones you toss.
That realization didn’t come to me overnight, but when it did I stopped waiting for environments to validate my value, protect my boundaries, or sustain my motivation. I chose to build those from the inside out.
Because companies don’t change unless people do - and you can’t make them want to.
So if you want to…
the how
Here’s a piece of wisdom I learned during my coaching studies at the Institute of Executive Coaching and Leadership (IECL):
We are the authors of our story.
I’d add: we're also the producers and the actors.
So if you want a different experience at work, a different reality, you have to understand the story you’re currently telling yourself.
One exercise from that training had a profound impact on me. It helped me become aware of my filters and toss quite a few. I hope it helps you do the same.
It’s called Exploring Your Story.
How it works:
Take a blank sheet of paper.
On the left, list aspects of your social identity and personal history: age, gender, class, etc. (copy from the photo from my workbook above)
On the right, list areas of your life journey: work, long-term personal projects and goals, attitude to life, etc. (copy from the photo from my workbook above)
Now reflect which aspects shaped the areas of your life on the right. Connect them with simple lines. You can have as many connections as you want.
There’s no right or wrong. Just filters (maybe patterns.)
What do you notice?
When I first did this in 2022, I clearly saw how places I’d lived filtered my ambition, my pace, my definition of success, productivity, and busyness. And, how family history influenced my beliefs and relationships life.
I understood that my story wasn’t fixed. It evolves because my filters evolve too.
Now bring this back to your high-pressure environment where expectations never seem to end.
Which filters are you using there?
Which one is making things harder than they need to be?
Which one would serve you better if you tried it on?
People may not change. Life will always happen. But how you interpret what’s happening around you and how you see yourself inside it can change.
And that can start today.
your play of the week
Notice your filters 📷
Block 20 quiet minutes this week and explore your story.
Ask yourself:
Which filter is amplifying overwhelm?
Which one erodes my confidence or boundaries?
Which filter am I ready to loosen (just a little)?
And if you want support letting go of the “do more, faster” productivity filter, that’s exactly what we work on inside The Good Busy Reset - a small group cohort that feels almost personal.
Because the alternative is perpetual reality of overwhelm, overcommitment, and overwork.
I’m helping 50,000+ leaders master Good Busy.
If The Good Busy Newsletter helps you, refer it to a friend and get rewards.
I know productivity - not illustrations. Stickman figures by Zdenek Sasek.
See you next Monday,
Kate
Founder, TheGoodBusy.com
PS: Need to rewire “I’m not doing enough” or “I can’t say no” filter? That’s what we do inside The Good Busy Reset cohort alongside leaders like you. Trusted by leaders from Roche, Bosch, and more.
Save 20% with RESET20 only until Jan 18, 2026.
PPS: Not sure yet? Get a taste of the tools and mindset shifts that make your balance possible in my free workshop.
